I still haven't found who I am...

rgarton's picture

It is my aim (in my next few blogs) to try and loosely outline where I have reached in my spiritual journey within an emergent community. Their is no real reason why you should listen to me or even read me and I am in no way trying to claim that what I am saying or writing is in any way truth or beyond that truth of God... some of you will have written me off simply by reading my name and others my be put off because I am not a NAME. But I’ve got my coffee (all can’t be that bad)...so this is simply my struggle within an emergent community and some conclusions that I have reached in my personal narrative...

Community formation is not a struggle of finding vision, direction or even purpose (as if god would ever be so singular). Community formation is mostly a struggle of identity. It is a question of who are you, who am I and who are we. Community is not about a name or logo but about understanding what we have to offer each other and hopefully a grasping of who we are in that offering. Common belief or direction is not a point of unification but rather the sharing of stories is what unites us and so an open community emerges of people who truly value each others stories and so truly value each other (irrespective of religious belief, moral lifestyle or race)...Community that deals with identity rather than 'purpose, vision or goals' becomes a community that is both open and generous (thanks you Mr McLaren for the help with the language) My community has; for me; become the place where we help each other discover how we each (as individuals) see and interact with our own perception of god as he/she/they appear in our culture/worldview/life. Instead of saying what god is 'telling someone' it is an attempt to help individuals understand how they see/interact/decipher god so that they, in their perception of god, can hear him/her/them for themselves. The community has becomes apart of the journey and is of no more importance than the movie I saw last night or the friends I am hanging out with which are also apart of the journey. The community changes as every new story is told and every question asked. I am in a community that has no answers... but is trying to simply understand who it is... a community that feels alot like my struggle...(end of part one)

richard is a cynical lover of coffee, jesus and the emergent conversation. Along with some friends he is trying to flesh out the conversation, find a new theology and provide an authentic spiritual space in melville called The Monastic Lounge. please feel free to contact him on rjgarton@yahoo.co.uk.

Comments

This sounds powerful

Just wanted to say that I like this. It sounds loaded with power, from all your expression and I suspect there is a lot of power behind each one of those words. Keep the good work going.

Good stuff Richard !

Good stuff Richard !

i am the connection

in my journey that has changed so much, thru belief and purpose.
the only thing that has never changed has been the connections i have with the people i love,
this is where i am found, in the stories and the journey, not just mine but those around me.

I feel like when those connections become about how i live, or what i believe that the connection becomes disjointed, because people are made up of more then just beliefs and morals, but emotions and pain and failing, and all we want is not for people to love us inspite of those things but love us for those things.

I love the people in my community for those very things, their stories, their pain, their hopes and dreams.
I feel like this is real community, and I will never go back to connections that were based on belief, lifestyle, vision, fear.

I'm found in the journey, the struggle, in the beauty of how we do those things together, badly and well.
I'm found in the connections.
a part of god in me (probably a small part) connecting with a part of god in another, just because I connect with them with nothing in between.

stuff does come in between, besides what I've mentioned, just not sure what those things are?

I love these people.

connect

Love you too Dyl.

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